Kitty News

Shock Love Triangle

The stars of Kittykat Laura have another scandal on their hands. Amazing kitty actor, Rayray Sunshine has been the boyfriend of co-star Goldie Fairydust, but is thinking of leaving her for another actress in Kittykat Laura, Jackie Blackie. Goldie has been reportedly furious at Jackie, often going around to Jackie's house and hissing insults through a window.

One of Jackie's friend's reports "Poor old Jackie is so traumatized by the thought of Goldie attacking her, she is scared of leaving her home and doing such mundane things and shopping."

Rayray hasn't made the situation easier. He sent a letter to both Queen's yesterday, asking them to please do as he says. Both Queen's wrote back letter's filled with anger. One letter reportedly said "I am not a doll, Rayray Sunshine!"

However, if Rayray indeed does want Jackie for a partner, he'd better be quick to woo her, as Jackie has been spotted cavorting around the malls of Highmeow Street with a handsome stranger. Paparazzi has managed to score a few pictures of the couple with their tails entwined, but unfortunately the photos were banned from use, as the stranger Jackie was with has asked Jackie to release a statement that no pictures of the Tom shall be revealed to public.

Kitty Times

Stardom too much for Rayray Sunshine

Rayray Sunshine, one of the main kitten characters for Kittykat Laura, has now fallen under the pressure of stardom.
After downing a bottle of Hokey-pokey ice cream chocolate sauce, he proceeded to drink Vodka and a Kimmy Lean, the cat version for the human Jim Beam.
"He's a kitten!" wept his mother, Intiey Sunshine, "He's drinking! He's only just of age! I am so horrified! He's done the movie, lets take him away from this... ******* stardom stuff."
After sobering up, we managed to get hold of Rayray and he told us why he was beginning to drink.
"Well," she said thoughtfully, "I would say it's because my girl-friend Goldie did't let me dump her. I mean, she's gorgeous and everything, but I want Jakie!!!"
We asked Jakie what she thought.
"First," she told us, "I am apalled that Rayray could do such a thing. Secondly, I have already been engaged once, and then cheated on, so I will never do it again."
Looks like things are getting heated with Kittykat Laura's cast!!!

Kitty Times

Kitten Becomes Instant Star

Jakie the Blakie (pictured) is the cutest, cuddliest, and now most famous kitten in kitten history. After scraping every single article ever printed by the kitty times, it has come to attention that
this adorable kitten is the first kitten ever to have a main part in a Human film.
Kittykat Laura is a box-office hit almost as soon as the story line was revealed. About a cute black kitten (Jakie Blakie), who is given birth in a farmyard. After hiding from her crazy owners father with her brother and sister (Rayray Sunshine and Goldie Fairydust), they start a long and winding path to civilization. Of course, someone had to notice three cute little kittens stauntering along a dirt road. They are picked up by a man named Luke and his girlfriend Nora. They take the kittens to the SPCA, but neither of them can resist the main kitten (Jakie Blakie). After mixing their names, the name Laura was born.
Told in Laura's voice and eye, she misses her brother and sister terribly. They were named Josephine and Blinky (The male is Blinky) and poor Laura is lost without them. She escapes, and in the end manages to catch up with a cat who had been at the SPCA at the same time as Laura, Blinky and Jo. Then, Laura starts to find her siblings.
Humans made the show, so naturally they can't understand Meataut - our language. Jakie's voice is played by Georgina Celeste - another budding star, just a human.
While humans listen to Celeste, TV 5's film-crew filmed the whole document in Meataut and is going out into the cinemas in another week.
Meanwhile, we will keep you up-dated with Jakie and Georgina, and their hit movie.



NOT TRUE (Though I wish it was).